So…have you been keeping up with the Fashun weeks, and the very glamorous guys and gals that grace it? If you have, you should seriously start a blog or something.

I mean, hey. I didn’t get to rub shoulders with Kanye, Ms. Wintour, or Lady Gaga this year (they all have really overzealous bodyguards). But I did comb through buckets of photos and came up with some pretty interesting ideas.

Here is my thesis, English Majors: wouldn’t it be awesome my four favorite designers of the season joined powers and chronicled the rise and fall of a rockstar purely in terms of her possible sartorial choices?
Short Answer for the Cliff Notes Kids: Yes, it would be freakin’ awesome.  In fact, I’m just going to pretend that that’s exactly what they did, if it’s all the same to you.

Did you notice how up first, we have Versace and her chain-adorned dresses? Clearly this denotes the rise of a rockstar in any genre. Black and white (but mostly black) with some awesome heavy metal accessories. What else is there to say, really, other than “rock on, sister?”

Of course, it’s usually around that time when the Paparazzi and everyone else who will want a piece of you will take notice. If you’re not careful, you could end up with mismatched clothing thrown on in a hurry, and the sad clown-like make-up that could very well be a fashion statement, or a clear sign that you’re losing your marbles. That’s right, fame is getting to you, and Vivianne Westwood knows exactly what you will wear as it has its way with you.

And maybe your family and friends stage an intervention, maybe they don’t. But the fact is, at a certain point. it looks like you’re too far gone. So far gone, that you’ve taken to wearing your grandma’s vintage pieces exclusively. Make no mistake, they are exquisite. But when you pair them with your new edgy hair and make-up, you look like the Bride of Frankenstein. Luckily for you, Thom Browne knows how to pull off this look, and has decided to help you out. Aren’t you lucky?

In the end, you might make it through, after all. Either because you have the support of friends and advisers, or despite it, you graduate from rehab, and learn the art of subtle style. You know exactly what wear to throw off the press, and still remain recognizable to your fans. You’re a bit sporty, and still you know how to add interesting pieces (like feathers in your hair) to add a bit of flair. It seems you are a fixture at every Y-3 show, and why the heck not? You know the ropes, and really, can’t nobody tell you s#*&! now.